probably the best thing i’ve read in a long, long time
This is taken from an incredibly brilliant friend on Facebook who was going back and forth with someone. The entire conversation is quite lengthy, but here is the best bit of it:
I really want to know why you believe homosexuality is wrong, when the primary mention of it in the Bible comes from the same book that forbids eating seafood (Leviticus 11:10) and any animal that chews its cud (Leviticus 11:6-8). Some translations go as far to say that any contact whatsoever with the skins of these animals is an abomination. By your logic, eating seafood and pork (and even touching leather) is an unhealthy act that too will separate the consumer from God. Leviticus 15:19-24 states that when a woman is menstruating, she should be separated from others for seven days, because she is unclean. Do you lock yourself away for a week every month because if a man even sits where you have sat during your monthly cycle, God will consider him impure? Leviticus 19:27 forbids men from shaving their sideburns or beards. Do all of your male relatives have facial hair that has never been trimmed or shaved? If not, you might want to save them- God doesn’t like that. Finally, because Leviticus has too many bizarre rules from God for me to list (I have dug pretty deep into Christianity- I’ve read the Bible twice over, and watched numerous lectures from contemporary Christian scholars), I’ll finish with Leviticus 19:19, which forbids people from wearing fabrics made from two materials mixed together. Tell me, do you have any polyester blends sitting in your closet? If so, you’re just as eternally separated from God as homosexuals.
Personally, homosexuality seems like a very silly act to forbid, considering it’s just love. The Bible has numerous instances of polygamy (take Solomon, for example), which is also outside of “traditional” marriage, but homosexuality is wrong? If God hates my friends for loving another person and following their hearts, He doesn’t really sound like someone I’d like to spend eternity with anyway. I’ll take hellfire over a temperamental deity who draws up rules that defy logic and psychologically torture His creation. I’m honestly not trying to attack you. I genuinely want to know why you consider homosexuality wrong, when I’m sure you’ve willingly taken part in other such “abominations” without considering them sinful and unhealthy. This is the Bible- if you’re going to follow a literal interpretation, you’d do well to read it in its entirety.
Perfect comeback is perfect.
conversations with customers
Customer: Where's my change?Me: By your legs.
Customer: Where's that?
Me:
Customer:
Me:
Customer:
Me:
Customer:
Me: Do you not realize where your legs are?
Illustration via For The Love Of Black Cats (Black Cat Appreciation Page)
